Should I stay or should I go

I'm at a crossroad again.. Just when I thought my life is rejuvenated , I go back to square one, in the gutter..

I wonder does everyone think that their life is just a sad sad tale? Like if it was a movie, it's a sadistic comedy becos of how it always turns out for the worst? I mean, I know I am blessed to have food on the table, a bed to sleep on etc.. But sometimes I just feel damn swuay.. Like as if every single step of the way, there are bumps.. Sometimes I feel I'm like the most swuay person in the world.. But obviously, it isnt a fact.. Just that it certainly feels that way those times..

Even right now as I blog, I really wonder why, why cant I be in one piece? Why must i have a freaking cough that lasts 3 weeks or the sore throat and flu before that during CNY sumore! I have been sick for a month now! Never full recovered.. And it's not like I din try, I stayed away from CNY goodies when I was sick, but when I recovered from sore throat and flu, the cough came.. Wonderful.. I cant ever fully enjoy CNY goodies! Like really? Why? It's really frustrating sometimes.. I try my best to look on the positive side, but things just keep coming.. Oh well.. What's new?

Glad I have this blog to rant all this insignificant stuff.. All these petty problems that get me sometimes..

But anw, my main story is that I may change CG again.. Oh well.. Just when I tot I'm on a run after making an effort to mingle with the CG and mixing in with them, then this had to happen.. My cgl's daughter is getting old now and needs more attention and education, so she needs to spend more time with her and she cant do that when she and her husband is different service days.. So after pondering for a while, she asked the CG if they were okay with Sun service.. And all were ok except me and this other member since I have soccer league while the other member got work on sun for a a few months..

I cant quit my soccer team cos I made a commitment to them and also cos I wanna play soccer. I already cant play soccer on Sat since I have classes, and if I go service on sunday, then i cant play soccer regularly anymore.. Soccer is my passion man!

Just when things start to come together, they fall apart again.. I tot this was my transformation.. New cg that i could mingle with, a new soccer team that I can play with, then now it becomes like this.

After assessing the situation, my options are..
1. Quit my league and team and just go for service with cg and totally miss soccer..
2. Wait for the end of the league that ends in May/June, and then go for service with cg after that while mean time I go to sat service with someone I know.. e.g Hp
3. Quit my cg now, attend a cg that attends Sat service and continue playing Sun soccer..

The funny thing is that I was speaking to Hp about Sun services last friday, and he was so happy that his cg is changing to Sat svc cos when he attends service, he normally sleeps during the preaching since it's so early.. Imagine, 10am at expo already cannot stand! 10am at suntec? How will it be any better? I've been to the odd sun services at expo from time to time, and honestly, it's no laughing matter, it's so hard to wake up and feel alive on a sunday morning.. Even if I'm physically awake, I still feel lifeless and stoned.. Sun is like my body's rest day, automatically switches off to rest. So that's a bummer.. One of the reasons why I'm contemplating changing to a new cg..

Option 1 is probably my last option since I dun want to quit the team and league cos even though we may not be good, it's nice playing with them.. I made friends with the team already.. And soccer is my passion!

Option 2 is the likelier option I will choose since it's like a play by ear option.. See how it goes since I know my life doesnt always go the way that I figured it will turn out.. But the bad thing is that I have to attend service with a cg im not familiar with.. I mean I will probably be going service different from my cg for 2-3 months? With that amount of time, I probably could join a new cg and get to know the ppl there also.. I've also been my current cg for like 3 months.. So what's the point of staying wif my current cg then? Correct?

And what happens after my league seasons restart say next year? Then another 6 months of going sat service? If I decide then sat service cg is better for me, then wouldnt i have wasted time staying on wif my current cg? And wldnt I make saying goodbye harder later compared to now since I'm only here for 3 months?

Which leads to option 3.. Quit the cg and join a permanent sat service cg.. But the bad thing is, I would have to make new friends all over again.. And I seriously hate that process.. HATE it.. It's not fun going through all the awkward moments.. And this time my zone already dont have any cgs that I would go to.. So where do i go then? It's a whole new problem by itself again..

I haven decided yet, tough choice to make really.. Hiazzzzz